Talking dirty on the phone is a fantastic way to have some kinky fun with your significant other on the phone or even to move into all-out phone sex with your lover. You may feel a bit silly or intimidated at the thought of talking dirty on the phone, but once you adjust your mindset and let loose, you'll be on your way to making your phone partner helpless with pleasure. If you want to know how to do it, just follow these steps.
Pick the right time to talk dirty
If you want to have a flawless dirty talk phone date, then you have to make sure that both you and your partner are alone and ready to start having a sexy conversation. Your dirty talk won't go very far if you're ready in bed while your partner is having dinner with his mom. Plan your dirty talk date in advance so both of you are free and alone at home or in your rooms.
Look and feel sexy
Take a nice warm bath and put on some sexy lingerie and a hot outfit. Even if your partner won't be able to see what you're wearing, you'll be more easily turned on if you look ready for some action. You can even rub some scented oil or lotion on the nape of your neck to get you in the mood.
Don't overthink it
Before you pick up the phone or start getting turned on, don't stare at yourself in the mirror or analyze every last thing you'll say to your lover. Even if you're a dirty talk virgin, the process will feel more natural if you just sit back, relax, and get ready for what's to come.
Start getting turned on. This doesn't mean you should touch yourself -- unless you want to -- but it does mean that you should start getting in a sexy mental space. Close your eyes and think of your most illicit sexual fantasy, or remember the last time it got really hot and heavy between you and your lover.
If it helps, you can lightly caress your body to get in the mood. But you should save most of that for your phone convo.
Find your "dirty talk" voice. It should still sound like you -- but like a sexier, slower-talking version of you. Don't use the same voice you would use to ask your honey how his day went. Instead, talk a bit lower and more slowly -- you can even lower your voice to a near-whisper if you want to. Just make sure it still sounds like you to an extent.
Give your lover a few compliments. You don't have to say anything X-rated right away. Just start with a few basic compliments. Tell your special someone how much you've missed him, and how amazing his body is. You can even remind him of the last time you had sex and how hot it was. Just start saying nice things to your lover to get into the mood. Here are some things you can say:
- "I've been thinking about your toned arms all day."
- "I miss you and your body so much."
- "I love hearing your voice."
Tell your lover what you're wearing and describe it in great detail. Talk about how your body looks in your clothes, and mention any parts that are exposed. Ask your lover what he or she is wearing and close your eyes and imagine him or her in those clothes.
Talk about what you would do if your lover was there
Start slow. Just say a few things that you wish would happen if your lover was there. You can get as graphic as you want, but you can start with the basics as you build toward your more elaborate fantasies. Here are some things you can say: "I wish your arms were around me right now", "I wish I could kiss your neck right now."
Touch yourself -- and describe how it feels.
You can do this at any point while you're talking dirty. But the earlier you do it, the more turned on you'll be. Start gently stroking your own body and let your lover know what you're doing. Then, ask him or her to touch his or her own body and be detailed about what you want him to do. As you keep talking, you can start touching yourself in your erogenous zones. Let your know lover exactly what you're doing to your body. If you're caressing your breasts or stomach, tell him.
Describe all of the sensations you feel to your lover. If you start to feel a sexy shiver after lightly caressing your neck, describe it.
Tell your lover how you'd want him to touch you
Start talking about all of the things you wish your lover would do to your body until you're both bursting with excitement. Take turns telling each other what you wish you could do to each other. This can get more graphic than just saying what you want to do to your lover.
Talk about what you want to do to your lover
Let your lover know exactly what you would do to his or her body if you were there. Now that you're starting to get excited and to touch your own body, you can kick it up a notch and say whatever you want to do to his body, no matter how dirty it is.
Talk about how turned on you are. Don't be shy -- tell your lover how turned on you are just from talking to him and thinking about him next to you. Let him know that you're excited and that you feel it all over your body. If you're so turned on that you feel it in your toes, tell your lover.
Reveal your greatest fantasies. Once you're really excited, share your fantasy with your lover, no matter how dirty it may be. He'll play along and talk about it with you, helping you get more turned on as you picture yourselves enacting the fantasy together. Don't be afraid to put it all out on the phone line -- just close your eyes and start talking.
Take off your clothes -- and talk about it. Don't just start stripping -- let your lover in on the peep show, button by button. If you're taking off your shirt, let him know that it's sliding over your head. If you're taking off your belt, let your lady know that you're dropping your belt to the floor. Paint a picture of your body that will turn on your lover even more.
Masturbate
If you just want to talk dirty just for fun or practice, then you can get off the phone and get off on your own. But if you really want to commit to talking dirty, then you and your lover should touch yourselves until you orgasm. If you want to keep things hot and heavy, you can announce your orgasm, and tell your lover that you're about to come. This will build anticipation and will turn both of you on even more. Once you've both orgasmed, you can say goodbye and look forward to your next dirty talk date.
As in real sex, it's pretty difficult to climax at the same time as your partner. If you climax first, just keep talking dirty to turn on your partner. Don't stop and ruin the mood. Keep talking dirty until both people are satisfied.
Have a sexy goodbye
Don't start transitioning into talking about how your days went; don't start telling goofy jokes, either. Just as you would cuddle after real sex, say some sweet, soft words to your lover and let him know how amazing he makes you feel. Get off the phone after a little while -- if you want to have a normal conversation with your lover, do it a bit later, so you can enjoy the sexy feeling after your dirty talk date.
