Ese Walter Ark, wife of Cool Fm OAP Benny Ark shot into public consciousness when, in 2013, she made public her alleged sexual relationship with married COZA Pastor, Biodun Fatoyinbo. Before the confession, she penned a heartfelt public letter to Jesus, thanking Him for giving her the grace to forgive.
Part of the note read: "Today I say thank you. Thank you for staying with me like you said you would. Thank you for your Spirit that leads and guides me into all truth and continues to lead me even when I insist on holding on to a lie. Thank you for not allowing me die before my time. Thank you for the hope and assurance in my heart. Thank you for helping me develop a stronger sense of purpose."
After the media frenzy that followed the scandal, she moved on with her life and had her first child with her hubby January last year.
It however came as a surprise when earlier this month she took to her Facebook page to denounce religion and everything that has to do with it. She says she no longer believes in God, but at the same time doesn't regard herself as an atheist, but rather as a humanist.
Here is what she wrote:
"On belief (or the lack thereof)
I had a conversation with my brother in law yesterday.
Brother-in-law: I have been going through your Facebook posts and I see that you no longer believe the christian faith. What is your belief now?
Me: I'm not sure I have a belief. I think I gave the entire belief thing up.
BIL: So you don't believe in anything now?
Me: Let me think about that.
*short pause*
Me: I believe that human beings came from the same source. We share this space called earth and it is in our collective best interest to live lives that nourish each other and the earth we live.
Trouble starts when we see ourselves as separate/different from each other.
BIL: So what is that same source?
Me: I haven't figured what that is yet and it doesn't matter as I know I won't figure all of my questions out before I die.
What I know is, this idea of "us vs them" is the main problem we have as humans.
I have gotten to a place in my life where I am in touch with the inner me, the essence, the love that is in all humans. And that helps me see other beings as myself. In the past when I was a christian, I thought anyone that didn't worship like me or believe in the god I claimed to believe was an enemy. That separation made me judge, hate and criticise others who believed different from me.
And I see this in many areas of life. This is probably why I don't do well in groups. Anytime there is a group of people bound by beliefs or the lack of, that group can easily slip into that place of separateness where everyone outside the group sparks the "we vs them" narrative.
This is one reason I don't identify as atheist. I think atheists have this "we vs them" mentality too especially with regards to religious people. Its the same thing I see with the LGBT community, they call themselves family, and people like us who don't have qualms with them are allies, while the homophobic lot are the "vs them" divide.
I identify as a humanist and my belief is the greatest good for all life forms on the planet.
BIL: I understand. I also think you will find your way back to god.
Me: I just realised that talking about god, religion and the many ills in the world is the reason I think change is impossible. I suspect tomorrow (today) will be the last time I give my energy to religion. I'd rather focus on reminding humans of their humanity.
BIL: That's a good place to be.
Me: I think so too.
P.S: Dear religious people, I am done talking about your religion and beliefs. Feel free to remind me anytime I forget and get pulled into religious talks or arguments."
